Posts tagged habits
What’s most important for you to focus on today? That’s a question I ask to start off each coaching conversation I have with clients. It’s a question I ask of myself each morning. I have many interests, and since you’re hanging out with me and reading my stuff, I’m guessing there’s a good chance that you do too. As a matter of fact, many of you lament the fact that you have “too many interests.” Hogwash.
It’s great to have interests but here’s a key to not feeling overwhelmed or ineffective. Choose at least 1 thing to do each day that will have a great impact and do at least 1 thing each day that just makes your heart sing.
What do I mean by “impact?” Well that will be personal to you, but it could be an action that will bring you recognition, or in the long run, continue to increase your income. It could change your career. Maybe it’s something that will make a difference in your community or make an important change to your personal life.
Here’s a way to figure out what to focus on. If you don’t already have an action list (to do list) quickly write out of all the things you think you should or want to do. Then look at each item and ask: How will this change my career, my work, my life? Will this have an impact a week, a month, a year from now? Does this task further a long term goal of mine…how important is this goal?
This might take a bit of time to do at first but once you practice, you can do this in just a few minutes. Don’t like this method? Try this one.
List the goals you’d like to accomplish in the next year. Then each day, choose at least one action that moves you closer to your goals.
And don’t forget to do at least one thing just because you love it. Because if you do, you’ll find yourself connecting with your “real” self…and that real self will guide you to do the things that are truly the most important things for you to do in order to live YOUR life, YOUR way.
Go ahead and share a goal with us here in the comment section. There’s great power in writing goals down and sharing them a supportive community. Want even more support and structure? Join our 30 Days to Get It Done group beginning October 6th…watch here for details on how to register or drop me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org with “30 days” in the subject line and I’ll send you the details.
What are some of your daily habits? It’s worth taking a look at them. Your habits shape what you do with your precious time. You can decide for yourself which habits you engage in are “good” or “bad.” I’d say that the actions you take that positively contribute to your health, happiness, prosperity and relationships are worth keeping. Anything else -well, you might want to make some changes. Here are some habits that I find to be dreamkillers:
1. Email. In my opinion, opening email first thing in the day is not the best way to start out. You’re allowing others to shape your thoughts, actions and even your mood. I say make your first actions meaningful ones -something that makes you happy, something that inspires you to live a fantastic day, or something that contributes to a goal you have. Check email after you’ve done the most important things first.
2. Mindless eating. I think this widely accepted American habit contributes to obesity, poor health and a lack of enjoyment. When you eat – just eat. Don’t read, watch tv or keep one hand on the keyboard. Be aware of the texture of the food, the taste in your mouth, how it feels in your belly. Give thanks for all the people involved in getting the food to your table. Sure, enjoy good conversation in between bites -but other than that – mindful eating will enhance your health and your life.
3. Noise. Lord, there’s noise everywhere! When I pump gas there’s a t.v. blaring at me (I skip that gas station now). I got a new dentist after my former dentist installed flat screen tvs in each exam room. I’m sure some patients appreciate it, but I got nervous when I noticed the dentist kept looking up at the t.v. Silence is a good habit to cultivate for the soul. Your inner voice knows a lot -it just needs a little time to be heard. Allow for some silence each day.
Be a gentle observer of your habits. Don’t beat yourself up -just notice. Which ones make you happy? Which ones move your goals and dreams forward? Which ones are obstacles. Pick one and decide to change it. Here’s a cool tool I found today that might inspire you -and it’s free. www.habitforge.com
Would love to hear about a habit you’re ready to change. Post your comment here and let us know!
Astronomers recently discovered that there are three times as many stars in the universe than was previously thought.
Up till now, they have seriously underestimated the number of other suns in other galaxies – and that means there must be many more planets orbiting them where other life forms might exist. Mind blowing!
Which got me thinking…where are you seriously underestimating yourself?
I see it all too often in people -I can see their amazing potential, their strong qualities, their unique way of looking at the world, yet they stay stuck in old, tired habits that aren’t fulfilling them.
Here’s how to see the three times as many stars in your personal universe that you just might be overlooking!
1. Make a decision.
Want to have a six figure income? A lighter body? A meaningful relationship? Decide today that you will have that and that nothing will stop you.
2. Get clear.
80% of your success comes from being absolutely clear about what you want to accomplish.
3. Plan every day in advance.
This simple habit is a practice every successful person uses.
4. Use simple project planning.
What does the end look like? What steps have to be done to get there? Organize the list of steps by priority and sequence. Be accountable to someone else for getting the steps done. Delegate what you can and hold others accountable.
5. Follow the 80/20 rule.
Make your first activities of the day be the 20% vital ones that will contribute 80% of the value to you.
6. Focus and concentrate without distraction on the most important thing you need to accomplish and stay with it till i’s done. If it’s a large task, break it down into doable chunks so that you can complete one piece at each sitting.
When you apply these practices and accomplish major things -you generate amazing feelings of well being. You’ll be happy and energized and motivated to take on the next task. And you will see that there is indeed an amazing bounty of all good in your universe just waiting for you to reach out and take it.
August is my month for lots of “down time.” And,
by giving myself time to just “be”, I find the
most creative thinking starts bubbling up.
Today I was thinking about how any marketing
or public relations we’re doing for our businesses
begins with the foundation of our “message.”
My message is “you’ve gotta do what you love.”
It breaks my heart to see people trudging
through one boring or stress filled day
after another, filled with longing for
I’m compelled to say -you can have that
better life! Start now!!
What’s your message? What have you always
known and want to share? What do you wish
someone had told you years ago?
I’d love to see your messages -go ahead
and post them on this blog -share your
message with the world today…we need it!
It used to be that psychology research focused on what was wrong with people and people with mental illness diagnosis. Starting in the 1950’s and really blossoming in the last 20 years is the field of Positive Psychology. Why should you care? Well the research coming out of this field can help you live longer, have better health, enjoy your relationships and live an authentic life. Here’s the deal. Each day you have lots of interaction with others -from your intimate relationships to the clerk at the grocery store. Each day has thousands of “moments”. And for the most part, you choose whether you are saying positive things or negative things in these encounters.
Research shows that in a marriage, a ratio of 5 to 1 (5 positive statements for each 1 negative statement) makes for a wonderful marriage -when you get to a ratio of 1 to 1 divorce is probably on its way. Now don’t get me wrong, Positive Psychology is not saying you have to walk around with a grin on your face all day spouting syrupy nonsense to everyone. No, you have to listen to your feelings and sometimes your feelings just plain suck. BUT, you can choose how you react to others. Here’s a few practical ways to increase the amount of positive encounters in your life.
First, become a gentle observer of yourself. Watch how many times you say something negative or criticize someone. Keep a mental (or written) tally for a couple of days. After that practice saying something kind or supportive….something positive to each person you encounter. Not only will they feel good, you will to…and it spreads! As each person you touch in a positive way then acts positive to another 2 people -the good feelings spread like amazing ripples.
Give it a try -and post a note here to let us know what happens!
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I’ve been following the relatively new field of Positive Psychology for the last few years –imagine studying people who are healthy and thriving and not just those with disorders and diagnosis –about time!
There are powerful research results coming out about the idea of gratitude. Findings say that gratitude helps maintain close connections with others. Gratitude is linked to more helping behaviors, high positive emotions, life satisfaction, increased hope and lower feelings of anxiety and envy. Who doesn’t want that!
In a research study on happiness, people in one group were asked to write a letter of gratitude to someone, a 2nd group was asked to write down five things they were grateful for each day for one week, and a 3rd group was asked to write down five things they were grateful for on a single day.
There appeared to be more benefit to listing your blessings 1 day a week rather than everyday (I wonder if it was because it was easier to remember to do it once!). All three interventions worked, providing people with increased happiness and hope. And even more impressive –the benefits lasted up to 6 months.
Of all the happiness interventions to date– gratitude gives the strongest effects.
The affirmative prayer method that I practice daily has a gratitude component to it. Being grateful for what is right now and feeling what it’s like to already have what you have asked for. When I practice affirmative prayer and get to the gratitude part, my heart always fills up so full…no matter what circumstances are appearing in my outside world…it is a wonderful feeling and always transforms me to a higher place.
Enjoy this season of gratitude, and post a comment on our blog about your experiences with gratitude…I’d love to hear them!
RT @TPEntrepreneur Still have that old bad habit? Here are 39 ways to finally bust through! http://budurl.com/njr9
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Noble Purpose is listening for the inner call to use your unique gifts to serve others.
Noble Purpose is a matter of the heart. It is about your heart opening and feeling intimately united with others. James Hillman in the Soul’s Code gives us the “acorn theory”. An acorn must grow into an oak tree –it cannot be a pine or a palm. Each life is formed by a particular image, an image that is the essence of life and calls it to a destiny, just as the mighty oak’s destiny is written in the tiny acorn.
Some of you might not have connected with it yet.
Some of you know what it is but have trouble living it
Some of you are living it but might want to live it even more fully.
But NONE of you need to CHANGE or be someone you are not. There is nothing to change; there is only the return to your deepest, Essential Self.
What throws you off track from living your Noble Purpose?
We get in our own way when we think our purpose has to be BIG, or unique – it is not always a call to the extraordinary, though it will keep stretching you. More often than not it is the embrace of the ordinary, doing what makes you feel simply satisfied and good.
Your habits and beliefs can stop you although they don’t have to. Can you believe “there is no limitation outside of our own ignorance, and since we can ALL conceive of a greater good than we have so far experienced, we all have the ability to transcend previous experiences and rise triumphant above them; but we shall never triumph over them while we persist in going through the old mental reactions.” (Ernest Holmes)
Are your beliefs supporting your noble purpose? If not, choose a belief that is not supporting you and write out an opposite belief that feels better to you. As the old thought arises, don’t feed it –just replace it with the new belief. It does not matter how much patience it takes: persevere and be patient with yourself until you can see that each succeeding month your consciousness is evolving into a higher place that supports you.
Take time to get quiet and listen to the still, small voice within. Meditate and use visioning to ask how to use your unique gifts to serve others. Uncovering your inner purpose may look formidable. It is not. This call to serve is very familiar –even obvious. It’s an aspect of your life you’ve known and danced with since childhood, a completely original expression of your unique self.
What is at the center of your life? Carefully examine where you spend your attention, your time. Look at your appointment book, your daily schedule. These things, these meetings, and errands–this is where you dedicate your precious days, hours, moments. This is what receives your care and attention –and, by definition, your love. Is this what you wish to love? Are these the people and situations you hope will receive the gift of your life?
If you do not feel connected to your Noble Purpose right now –relax. You don’t have to agonize over it – your Noble Purpose is already a creative force within you –to fulfill it you might just need to get out of the way!